Someone Got Tagged

The anti-personnel frag mag
Is okayed by the lowest and a jag
Off-putting how they're starting to brag
That it's always been their bag.
Witch whispers say a nag & a hag
Wrote an old con creed on a dirty old rag
The lowest & the jag added in some slag
And voila!
The anti-personnel frag mag.
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Did they celebrate with a shag, a zigzag & a fag?
(old school take off on a straight cigarette & a square?)
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What do they pay you for?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9CxT48jIgI&feature=related

Other Stuff

You know what they say about corn syrup? They say that first the corn plant was and is mutated to stand tall against sprayed poisons, then it is liquified with more unnecessary and unhealthy chemicals into a glucose syrup which is injected into anything that stands still long enough, then we eat it and drink it for calories with no food value. They also say that beet sugar has food value.
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He got free rides in from Hog Wallow Haven every other week. He sat and took up some space. Then he got free rides back home to Hog Wallow Haven. His successor came from inside an oyster's mouth. Where he'll go back to is anybody's guess. We have to stay.
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The possibilities seem endless. If you wish to be "post racial and black for an hour," chris will assist. If you want to be pre-common sense and highlight a yellow stripe, as you fear my dear.
If you care to be concurrently homogeneous and pentabulously
5-colored, proceed and be freed.
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When Dull, Null & Lull won over Cull & Hull to their downslide, the other four had to go suck eggs. At least that's what their faces said, but please don't talk about faces. Null & his associate don't like faces. Wait until they find out that their last work day was in the past and their next work day is in the future. It will blow what they have left.

RepubliCornSmut

Since the hostile merger of the decaying republican age with the mutated corn syrup age, everything it touches turns to republicornsmut, blindfold-financed by us through the whiners, illegally recorded, and quite medicated for continuity purposes only. You will pay and pay for this announcement.
You don't want to know how.

Memo re: Pleased to March Marching Orders

cc: F*x, See An N, & young republicans everywhere

First, please continue to omit vital information from your social propaganda.
For example, repeating the phrase
"haters who voted for Obama"
is excellent. Nobody will notice the crucial word
"fear"
has been removed.
Fear haters who voted for Obama changes the whole dynamic,
don't you see.
Second, please continue to speak someone else's words,
rather than your own.
Lastly, please continue voting
against
your own good health & welfare.

Sounds Like

The taxes of our upheaval
Fund wars' killing, not people.
Everything's okay,
Take it away -
Prophylaxis of a bho weavel.
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Ink-a-dink laser printer ink
I fell down and you -----.
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Is Harold Ford an *ssh*l*?
*
Is Andre Bauer an *ssh*l*?

Presidential Smoothy

Hey Mr. President! What are you thinking?

I'm thinking you notice how smoothly I walk down the street.

Sure. So what, Mr. President.

I'm thinking you notice how I ever so quietly watch where I'm going as I smoothly walk. For instance, you saw that I could have fallen into an enormous hole when I picked up that pebble and threw it down the sewer. Someone might have tripped on it.

Mr. President, what about the enormous hole?

Please do not be confused by this information, but I don't pick up holes. They won't fit down the sewer.

Sir! Listen to that! It sounds like a war is going on around the corner!

Wrap your mind around this, little buddy, not the corner:
war is peace.

Hey Mr. President! The biggest d*mn pill bottle I've ever seen is rolling right at us! We're going to be crushed!
I don't have insurance and I'm gay!

I see another pebble, even smaller than that other one.
I've still got the vision. Oops, it's a dime.
I've got the change and the vision.

Does Winter End?

If appearances are everything and you can look like a million
for around $42.50, which shoes would you wear?
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Can 2 old ladies get along if one of them is the son of the other?
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"In a situation like this, everything is a sacrifice.
Every choice is a sacrifice."
L&O:SVU, "Fault", '06
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"If you drive high, you'll be buried low." - Red Skelton
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He was a slur on benHur, the last of the Boyd brains
& a big hit with the Danes.
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Yes, Sir. Gay, Sir. Yes, Sir. Geezer. Yes, Sir. Guy, Sir.
Yes, Sir. Go, Sir. Yes, Sir. Goo, Sir.
*
Yes, Sir.

Remember

We are too immature to ride in the healthcare boat with the big boys in Washington D.C.
Let's just float on any piece of sh*t we can find for the next 60 years, okay?
Please remain seated and part of the problem.
Please continue voting against your own best interests and for the interests of the very wealthy.
I'm sure they appreciate it.
Please do not add to your already vast store of knowledge.
Thank you.
Remember: Nobody needs no stinkin' wisdom.

It Is Not Contagious

I heard that some people who speak in the media suffer from
Hoof in My Own Mouth Disease, the HiMOM virus. It is supposed to be worse than Swine flu or Bird flu or everyday flu with no name. It is not contagious, so that's good. :~)

Want To?

If you can ice skate on the Gulf,

and I can water ski on an iceberg in Lake Michigan,

let's have a power lunch in

Chattanooga.

Strangers

Once upon a time, the mother of all spines and the marine produced one half of a dozen oxygen-breathers. The marine discharged himself early for good behavior. Besides, he didn't feel like watching the mother of all spines turn herself right side in and get real real ugly. That was the oxygen-breathers' job, until each one barfed and took a powder. Then it would be the job of strangers. Good for the strangers.
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Do you want to purchase an authentic certificate which entitles you to be on a one-member board that determines your monetary compensation for services rendered? Send me $19.95.
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Wasn't Pete Hoekstra a member of the C Street building in Washington D.C.? Are memberships lifetime? It's nice for him that any vows he breaks will be okay with his fellow members.
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Only about 10% of our local community banks failed, they were never bailed out. Only about 100% of the big 3 banks failed, they were all bailed out. The scaley skin of injustice...
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When Mrs. Rod sat in vegetation, the former Mr. Rod made up his mind that no matter how long it took, he would get more attention with a wordvomit sentence than with vegetation.

Another Drug Memo

Now that the majority of the baby boomers have been given colonoscopies and had some of their cockiness rubber hosed,
let's talk drugs. Only about half of the boomers are on daily
drugs. That is nowhere near good enough. The goal is 100%!
So what is to be done about it?

"Crapification" Vacation and or Adjudication

He said it would be televised on C-Span.

He said a lot of things.

He said we have to adapt.

I wonder if he will adapt actions to his own words.

He said war is peace.

Yeah. Crazy talk.

He said public option but did pubic loption.

What the l? Where's the l?

***

Lonnie Johnny and Ronny

Connie Bonnie and Donny

RooDee Ghoulie and Onnie

Told the mayor to get out of town.

***

If Phillip Morris added addictive chemicals to their cigarettes, would they also add addictive chemicals to their various frozen pizzas, to cheese itself?

Dear Somebody

Does adapting to fight terrorists include
following existing rules and regulations?
Does common sense play any part in the adapting?
What about imperialism? Still going strong?
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Queue ewe the sheep
We oui the peep
One run a fowl
Hear here the howl
Sing king reel cheep
*
When Doves Cry
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5792204981326161348#
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parentheses - so old fashioned
semi colon - nobody understands it
quotation mark - is there time anymore
period - no there isn't

Just Another Story

Once upon a time, a bee and a king fell in love. Can you imagine that? The bee's family did not like the king. It should have been the other way around, but things aren't always right side up. They had 2 lovely children. Can you imagine that too while you're at it? One of the kids was a miniature king. Sometimes he was hard to find when you really needed him, but that was just him and wasn't he special? His sister turned out to be supernaturally wise when it came to figuring out that her daughter was her very own source of joy. The bee and the king made themselves a nice life, a good life, except for a couple of minor details. One, quite a while ago but almost before they knew it, 2 other lovely people became the parents of their grandchildren and began running the family circle ragged, as if there wasn't enough running already. Two, the bee often hurt herself and others with her stinger. Other than that, this is just another story.
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Next week: Are the bee and 1 of the 2 other lovely people involved in a power struggle? Will a new character, grandkid and helper of mankind, end up being a lovely person herself? Is she the object of the power struggle? I can't wait to find out.

Happy New Year! War is Peace

If Sarcasm is an ironic gibe and if Slivers are splits along and with the grain and if Other Stuff is the material and materiel of which everything is created, then lots of times statements are not intended to be factual and lots of times they are. That did, does, and will cover any and all past, present, and future statements.